Today marks 10 years…
10 years since I failed out of college.
10 years since my world collapsed in a way I never dreamed possible.
10 years since I lost almost everything I knew about myself.
10 years since I first felt truly, irreparably broken.
In the time since, I have completely transformed:
I got my first “real” job and learned what life was like outside the world of academia. Several other jobs followed this.
I have lived in 3 different states with 3 entirely different sets of cultures.
I found my life’s calling and made sense of the aimless wandering I did professionally for many years.
I discovered 2 television shows that taught me how much more there is to life than what I had known for the previous 2 decades.
I met a lot of amazing people who really helped shaped me into the man I am today.
I found many different mentors who taught me more about life and the world than I ever learned in a textbook. One of these mentors has inspired my current moniker.
I finished my Associate’s Degree, making me something more than just a high school graduate.
When I felt the world collapsing around me again, I eventually snapped out of it and pressed onward.
In returning to finish my Bachelors, I had a semester (Fall 2020) where I accomplished straight A’s and had the best GPA of my life academically. (The clearest sign to me that I have been in the right track all along!)
I’ve learned to stand on my own feet, take responsibility for my choices, and broken down my fear of being alone.
The past 10 years have been far beyond what I could have ever imagined when my heart & soul were smashed apart by my own inability-of-the-time. I had no idea those broken pieces would form a whole greater than what they were broken from.
Looking forward, there’s still a lot of road left to go. In theory, and with a bit of luck, hard work, grit, and perseverance, this time next year I’ll be walking across a college graduation stage. Hopefully with a serious career launch right after that.
Even more hopefully, I dream of life filled with love, family, and friends, because that’s why life is worth living. Texas has become this cocoon where I’ve focused so much on my profession that I’ve lost touch with so much of what makes me human and why life is worth living. I still haven’t fixed my character flaw of not reaching out to more people when times are dark. I continue to be grateful for those who have stuck with me during this time and hope I can see you in person again someday.
I could be wrong, but nevertheless foreword I shall push on.